Check-In Post - Dec 21st 2025

Dec. 21st, 2025 06:21 pm
badly_knitted: (Get Knitted)
[personal profile] badly_knitted posting in [community profile] get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.


This Week's Question: Does anyone have any plans for making Christmas gifts or cards?


If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!



The longest night of the year

Dec. 21st, 2025 12:00 pm
melagan: Coffee cup with Atlantis in the rising steam (Default)
[personal profile] melagan
There's something magical about the longest night of the year.

no title

Happy Solstice!

B5 Double Drabble: Enduring

Dec. 21st, 2025 05:05 pm
badly_knitted: (B5)
[personal profile] badly_knitted
 


Title: Enduring
Fandom: Babylon 5
Author: 
[personal profile] badly_knitted
Characters: Delenn.
Rating: PG
Spoilers/Setting: Comes the Inquisitor.
Summary: Delenn will endure whatever she must in order to prove herself.
Written For: Challenge 495: Amnesty 82 at 
[community profile] fan_flashworks, using Challenge 40: Purgatory.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Babylon 5, or the characters. They belong to J. Michael Straczynski.
A/N: Double drabble.
 


 
lannamichaels: Astronaut Dale Gardner holds up For Sale sign after EVA. (Default)
[personal profile] lannamichaels


Title: Pillar Of The Community.
Author: [personal profile] lannamichaels
Fandom: Wake Up Dead Man (2025)
Rating: G
Archives: Archive Of Our Own, SquidgeWorld

Summary: Martha Grace Wicks, from her first murder to her last.


Flashfic! )

FAKE Double Drabble: Silent Night

Dec. 21st, 2025 04:52 pm
badly_knitted: (BSP 5 - Dee & Ryo)
[personal profile] badly_knitted
 


Title: Silent Night
Fandom: FAKE
Author: 
[personal profile] badly_knitted
Characters: Ryo, Dee.
Rating: PG
Written For: Challenge 481: Glow at 
[community profile] drabble_zone.
Setting: After Like Like Love.
Summary: It’s Christmas Eve in Dee and Ryo’s apartment.
Disclaimer: I don’t own FAKE, or the characters. They belong to the wonderful Sanami Matoh.
A/N: Double drabble.
 
 


Can't I take my own binoculars out?

Dec. 21st, 2025 10:50 am
sovay: (I Claudius)
[personal profile] sovay
The most disturbing part of A View from a Hill (2005) is the beauty of Fulnaker Abbey. From a dry slump of stones in a frost-crunched field, it soars in a flamboyance of turrets and spires, a dust-gilded nave whose frescoes have not glowed in the wan autumn sun, whose biscuit-colored fluting has not been touched since the dissolution of the monasteries. His customarily tight face equally transfigured, Dr. Fanshawe (Mark Letheren) turns in wonder through the rose windows of this archaeological resurrection, a ruin to the naked, post-war eye, through the antique field glasses which first showed him the distant, fogged, impossible prospect of its tower in a chill of hedgerows and mist, medievally alive. In a teleplay of sinister twig-snaps and the carrion-wheel of kites, it's a moment of golden, murmuring awe, centuries blown like dandelion clocks in a numinous blaze. It is a product of black magic only a little more grimily direct than most reconstructions of the past through a lens of bone and it would be far more comforting as a lie.

Visible in appropriate hindsight as the first in the irregular revival of A Ghost Story for Christmas (1971–78), A View from a Hill was adapted for the small screen by Peter Harness and faithfully preserves the antiquarian creep of its source M. R. James while remixing much of the detail around its central conceit, its adjustments of period and tweaks of class taking the story from an eerie sketch of the skull beneath English pastoral skin to an explicit meditation on the double edges of disinterring the past, specifically who decides what the transcendence of time is worth and who foots the bill. It can be mistaken for a purely material question. Aristocratically cash-strapped and as tone-deaf to transcendence as to manners, Squire Richards (Pip Torrens) would be the first to admit he's only called in an old school favor from the Fitzwilliam because his inheritance of antiquities might have something in it to bail out the stately crumbling home. "Never really my thing, standing in a field, grubbing about in the past. One wants to get oneself out there, don't you think? Get a bit of life." Fortunately for that piece of breathtaking tactlessness, Fanshawe came prepared to be condescended to, his archaeological credentials carefully organized to offset his grammar-school accents and implicitly junior standing, packed off to the countryside to investigate a miscellany of Crimean souvenirs and unremarkable Roman ware. He was not braced to discover a double of sorts in the amateur figure of F. D. Baxter (Simon Linnell), the village antiquary still remembered suspiciously for the macabre chime of his death with the obsessions which preceded it. "Fancied himself an archaeologist, like yourself . . . Used to be very bothered with ransacking and rummaging all the history of the place." To be classed with a half-educated watchmaker predictably flicks his defenses, but Fanshawe seems nevertheless to feel some sympathy for this ill-reputed character whose notes led unerringly to worthwhile finds—the kind of professional half-life he might have had to settle for himself, a pre-war stratified generation or two ago. Besides, Baxter was just as transfixed by that mysterious apparition of an abbey, judging from the beautiful, precisely drawn elevation that Fanshawe finds among his papers, complete in every corbel and tracery and dated to 1926 when the squire and the less eccentric evidence of his senses assure him that nothing remains but the cold little scatter of stones that he cycles out to inspect by the rime-glint of afternoon, looking as he paces the dimensions of its absence in his fallow windbreaker and the overcast of his own breath at once tougher and more contemplative, on his own ground for once instead of the back foot of his diligent, tiresome job. His fingers move over a half-buried, moss-crisped stone as if its lost architecture were held like amber within it. Even an inexplicable wave of panic after a puncture at the wooded top of the locally named Gallows Hill can't dim his fascination with the site and the brass-bound binoculars which seem to pierce time to show him more than any survey or excavation or illustration ever could, the past itself, not its denuded, disarticulated remains. Reflections from the Dead: An Archaeological Journey into the Dark Ages, reads the title of the manuscript he brought to edit in his spare time. He looked, too, through the eyes of that curious, earth-browned skull-mask that came, like the binoculars, out of Baxter's collection: "Some of it is pretty bizarre." Of course, there all his troubles began.

James reserves this fact for the punch line of "A View from a Hill" (1925), the ickily logical explanation for the optical disillusion by which placid scenery may become a deep-soaked site of violence. The teleplay drops it square in the middle of its 40 minutes, a night-flashed miniature of folk horror narrated by the aged, watchful manservant Patten (David Burke) with masterful suggestion. "My father served on the inquest. They returned a verdict of unsound mind." Frustrated with the human limits of fieldwork and too much alone with the tools of his trade, Baxter is locally averred to have taught himself as much necromancy as archaeology when he rendered the bones of the dead of Gallows Hill in order to paint the lenses of his field glasses into ghost-sight, an optical coating of the unlaid past. His rain-caped figure sketching on an autumnal hillside would be a study in the picturesque except for the feverish avidity of drawing a dead building from life, the success of his spectral optics which merely conceal the grisliness of their cruder predecessor, the freshly unearthed front of a skull. Harness does not have him cry as in the original story, "Do you want to look through a dead man's eyes?" but visualizes the line until we wonder even whether it accounts for the accuracy of the unexcavated sites left behind in his notes, a sort of ground-penetrating radar of the dead. Or he had a real feel for the tracks of time in the land, for all the good it eventually did him: "What," the squire greets the payoff with meta-modern skepticism, obviously not the target audience for antiquarian ghost stories, "the hanged men came for Baxter because they didn't like their bones being boiled?" Fanshawe for whose benefit this ghoulish moral was actually exhumed doesn't commit himself that far. "It's an interesting story." Relocating it complicates him as a protagonist, but not beyond what either Jamesian canon or extra-diegetic relevance will bear. By the time he brings the binoculars back to the sun-whitened field where the abbey waits under its accretion of centuries, he knows too much to be doing it. Not only has he heard the story of their ill-fated creation, he's seen the drawings that support it, even experienced a dreamlike encounter in the bathroom of all places where the water swirled as cloudily as leached bone and the face flickering like a bad film behind its skull's visor belonged to a pale and crow-picked Baxter. As if their stolen second sight were as much of a beacon as the torch he flashed wildly around in the restless dusk, Patten attributed his terrifying sense of woodland surveillance to his possession of "those glasses." It makes any idea of using them feel intolerably foolhardy of Fanshawe, but more importantly it makes him complicit. Despite its cadaverous viewing conditions, Fulnaker Abbey is not an inherently cursed or haunted space: its eeriness lies in its parallax of time, the reality of its stalls and tapers in the twelfth century as much as its weather-gnawed foundations in the twentieth in one of those simultaneities that so trouble the tranquil illusion of a present. To anyone with a care for the fragility of history, especially a keen and vulnerable medievalist like Fanshawe, its opening into the same three mundane dimensions as a contemporary church is a miracle. For the first time as it assembles itself through the resolving blur of the binoculars, we hear him laugh in unguarded delight. None of its consecrated grandeur is accessible without the desecration of much less sanctified bodies, the poachers and other criminals who fed the vanished gibbet of Gallows Hill and were planted thick around it as the trees that hid their graves over the years until a clever watchmaker decided that their peaceful rest mattered less than the knowledge that could be extracted from their decayed state. It happened to generate a haunting—a pocket timeslip constructed without the consent of the dead who would power it, everyone's just lucky they stayed quiescent until attracted by the use of the device again—but it would not have been less exploitative had Baxter done his grave-robbing and corpse-boiling with supernatural impunity. No matter how gorgeous the temporally split vision from which Fanshawe begins to draft his own interior views, it's a validation of that gruesome disrespect and it's no wonder the dead lose no time doing him the same honors as the man who bound them to enable it.

Directed by Luke Watson for BBC Four, A View from a Hill is inevitably its own artifact of past time. The crucial, permeable landscape—Herefordshire in the original, the BBC could afford the Thames Valley—is capably photographed at a time of year that does most of its own desaturation and DP Chris Goodger takes visible care to work with the uncanniness of absence and daylight, but the prevalence of handheld fast cutting risks the conscious homage of the mood and the digital texture is slicker than 16 mm even without the stuttering crash zoom that ends in a superfluous jump scare; it does better with small reminders of disquiet like a red kite hovering for something to scavenge or the sketch of a burial that looks like a dance macabre. The score by Andy Price and Harry Escott comes out at moments of thinned time and otherwise leaves the soundscape to the cries and rustles of the natural world and the dry hollow of breath that denotes the presence of the dead. Fulnaker Abbey was confected from select views of the neo-Gothic St Michael's in Farnborough and Fanshawe's doctoral thesis sampled ironically from a passage of Philip Rahtz: The gravestones are indeed documents in stone, and we do not need to excavate them, except perhaps to uncover parts of the inscription that have become overgrown or buried . . . As a three-and-a-half-hander, the teleplay shines. Letheren's mix of prickliness and earnestness makes him an effective and unusual anchor for its warning to the heedless; even if that final explosion of wings in the brush is as natural as it sounds, Fanshawe will never again take for granted a truly dead past, nor his own right to pick through it as though it had no say in the matter. Taciturn except when essentially summarizing the original James, Burke avoids infodump through little more than the implication that Patten keeps as much to himself as he relates, while Torrens in tweed plus-fours and a total indifference to intellectual pursuits more than occasionally suggests a sort of rusticated Bertie Wooster, making his odd expression of insight or concern worth taking note of. Linnell as the fatally inventive Baxter is a shadowy cameo with a spectral chaser, but his absorbed, owlish face gives him a weird sympathy, as if it never did occur to him how far out of reason he had reached into history. "Always had some project on the go or something. And pretty much the last job he did was finishing off those glasses you took." It is characteristic of James as a troubler of landscape and smart of the teleplay not to tamper with his decision to make the danger of their use entirely homegrown. Who needs the exoticism of a mummy's curse when the hard times of old England are still buried so shallowly?

I seem to have blown the timing by watching this ghost story for the solstice rather than Christmas, but it's readily available including on the Internet Archive and it suited a longest night as well as somewhat unexpectedly my own interests. I might have trimmed a few seconds of its woodland, but not its attention to the unobjectified dead. With all his acknowledged influence from James, I can't believe John Bellairs never inflicted a pair of haunted binoculars on one of his series protagonists—a dead man's likeness transferred through his stolen eyes is close but no necromantic banana. This project brought to you by my last backers at Patreon.

four things make a post?

Dec. 21st, 2025 05:44 pm
summerstorm: (Default)
[personal profile] summerstorm
So I finished Silksong, and then I finished it again because I'd somehow missed a spool fragment and wanted 100% completion, and then I finished my second playthrough but with the Act II ending, and then I cursed myself and tried to beat Grandmother Silk twice and started a third playthrough, this time on the PS5 version of the game so I could get all the trophies again. I'm up to Act III with Silk Soar like 25 hours in, which is impressive, and banging my head against the Skarrsinger fight again, which is not.

The financial situation continues to be not ideal, but maybe it will improve soon? I'm also trying to get some things going -- a pixieset shop for my prints, and I want to make some battlemaps and put them up on ko-fi maybe along with those ttrpg cards I wanted to design this summer but never did. I'm doing a little better in general, in the getting things done department. Not great by any means, but better.

The puzzle I mentioned last post is taking some kind of shape, or at least some of the pieces are (the shape is a horse and a rider). I'll go get some big sheets of cardstock tomorrow so I can keep the puzzle on my old desk instead of on small sheets of cardstock where it doesn't fit.

The vertical drying rack is a lifesaver, tbh. It rained on my clothes outside last week and they were so drenched it took them five days to go back to just damp in places. This last load laundry I divided between the rack and the outdoor clothesline, and it's rained on them again. I think I might do a tiny laundry load tomorrow and then toss the outside clothes in there for a spin cycle or twenty and hang them indoors as well. I'm honestly surprised by how quickly they dry in my room, but absolutely not complaining.

Double Drabble: Twin Trouble

Dec. 21st, 2025 04:39 pm
badly_knitted: (Pout)
[personal profile] badly_knitted
 


Title: Twin Trouble
Author: 
[personal profile] badly_knitted
Characters: Ianto, Twins.
Rating: PG
Written For: Challenge 896: Carry, at 
[community profile] torchwood100.
Spoilers: Nada.
Summary: The twins are being difficult, as usual.
Disclaimer: I don’t own Torchwood, or the characters.
A/N: Double drabble.
 
 


[syndicated profile] fail_feed

Posted by Remy Millisky

For some employees, there's one pivotal moment that solidifies their will to leave their current job. That's the exact moment they walk out the door, never to be seen again (by their current bosses and coworkers, anyway). 

In many cases, the reason has to do with poor management. Your job can have tons and tons of downsides, but if you have a reliable boss who has your back, you figure that things will all work out eventually. But for so many workers, the managerial burden is placed on them, all while they make 20x less than their bosses. For example, for workers in the retail field, pressure can be intense: their bosses want the stores to be perfectly clean and stocked every night, leaving them to do 16 hours of work in 4 hours with 2 people. This might mean that some employees are breaking a sweat rushing around, trying to complete every task by the night's end… all while their boss sits in a back room somewhere doing literally nothing, secure in the knowledge that their employees are doing it all. 

These workers highlighted the exact moments they walked out of their jobs — some for good, and some just for a few hours to cool off before heading back to the trenches. You never know what will be someone's final straw! 

Solstice

Dec. 21st, 2025 08:19 am
ranunculus: (Default)
[personal profile] ranunculus
Solstice greetings to those who celebrate this turning point. 
I am so glad that the days will be getting longer, no matter how small the increment at first. 
netgirl_y2k: (Default)
[personal profile] netgirl_y2k
In a fit of unrealistic optimism I signed up for [community profile] ficinabox, because, sure, after having not written any fic in a year I could definitely write 10k in quick succession.

(Narrator: she couldn't.)

I ended up having to drop a bunch of that wordcount because I suck and have forgotten how to make words happen, but I did enjoy writing again.

(Narrator: she didn't. It was like pulling teeth.)

And I'm pretty proud of what I did manage to write.

(Narrator: Actually, kind of, yeah.)


Bella Ciao (ciao ciao ciao) (Andor; Vel/Kleya; post-series; 5k)

“I’ve never–” Kleya panted.

“With a woman, you mean.”

“With anyone.”

“What?” Vel pushed herself up, and Kleya slid off her lap to one side.

Vel had lost her virginity to an older cousin of Perrin’s who'd fingered her in an empty shuttle at Mon’s wedding, and who afterwards had cried and begged Vel not to tell anyone or it would ruin her life.

“I’ve been busy,” Kleya said archly.



Ladies and Gentlemen We Are Floating in Space (The Marvels; Carol/Valkyrie; 2k)

“What does Asgardian divorce look like, anyway?”

“Oh, it’s quite easy,” said Val cheerfully, “I’d just have to publicly denounce you for sexual inadequacy and then punch you in the face.”

“...How publicly, exactly?”

Or,

Four times Carol and Val don’t get divorced.



In continued unrealistic fits of optimism I am both considering signing up for [community profile] rarefemslashexchange, and trying to write a Pluribus fic before the finale airs on Wednesday, because, Jaysus, I have so many feelings about that show.
[syndicated profile] fail_feed

Posted by Jesse Kessenheimer

When it comes to Lord of the Rings fans, most of us are fairly certain we could walk barefoot to Mordor and back. Then again, I'd wager that most humans are not only overly confident but also overestimate the strength of the skin under their soft, pale feet. That being said, there's no human who could have survived the walk to Mordor from Brie; that's not even factoring in the heinous jokes of Gollum, the chase of the Nazgûl, or the ever-present gaze of the One Ring.

Hobbits were the only creatures in Middle Earth capable of such a feat, pressing onward towards volcanic Doom, as the fate of all things good rests on their tiny shoulders. While the hobbits are supremely special creatures, capable of eating up to 15 times a day, reading six books in a week, and drinking at least two half-pints at the Green Dragon pub in Hobbiton, what they lack in stature they make up for in wholeheartedness. Without skipping a beat, most hobbits will leave their comfortable world behind them, tackling adventures far too big for the likes of 'em, and carrying the (literal) weight of the world around their necks in the process. 

No human could do that. 

Sure, LOTR fans are built differently and are able to binge-watch three 3-hour movies in a row without batting an eye, but we lack the steadfastness of the hobbits, the raw strength of the dwarves, the grace of the elves, and the motivation of a stew-filled Aragorn fleeing the battlefields of Gondor to outrun a shield-maiden's soup. Humans have their upsides, I suppose. Largely their supreme motivation to follow their passions, humans are perfectly equipped to enjoy some of the best things to come out of the Lord of the Rings universe… Memes.

Via u/there_and_dank_again

For when it comes to mental fortitude, we humans have the upper hand, especially when we're watching another round of LOTR, picking up The Silmarillion, strolling through the woods pretending we're an Ent, or swinging a Christmas wrap tube around saying, "This is a good sword." Scroll onwards, fellow LOTR maniac, and flex those human attributes of perseverance. Show the inhabitants of Middle Earth what we humans are made of! …And by that, I mean take a look at these memes, of course. 

shroomystar: (Default)
[personal profile] shroomystar posting in [community profile] 100ships
Title: Cherry Wine
Rating: Teen
Category: F/M
Fandom: Fear & Hunger 2: Termina
Author: shroomy(y)star
Ship/Characters: Olivia Haas/Marcoh
Warnings: Implied death/violence, blood
Word Count: 500
Summary: Marcoh looks at her like some part of him thinks she could save him.

ao3 | dreamwidth
tarlanx: ZZS holding WKX - head and shoulders (Cdrama - Word of Honor 8 - ZZS-WKX)
[personal profile] tarlanx posting in [community profile] ghost_valley
Title: Ghost Valley
Author: Tarlan ([personal profile] tarlanx)
Fandom: Word of Honor (TV 2021)
MAIN Pairing/Characters: Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishu, Ye Baiyi
MINOR Pairing/Characters: Gu Xiang/Cao Weining, Zhang Chengling, Jing Beiyuan, Wu Xi, Luo Fumeng
Rating/Category: NC17 SLASH
Word Count: 19180
Summary: Finally putting the ghosts of the past to rest had freed Wen Kexing in a manner he had never truly expected. For the first time he looked out across Ghost Valley and no longer saw a pitiful realm of criminals and monsters in human guises but real people who had no place else to go.

Content Notes: Written for IetjeSiobhan for [community profile] ficinabox 2025.

On AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/72633681
 
tarlanx: Zhou Zishu head and shoulders (Cdrama - Word of Honor 3 - ZZH)
[personal profile] tarlanx posting in [community profile] c_ent
Title: Ghost Valley
Author: Tarlan ([personal profile] tarlanx)
Fandom: Word of Honor (TV 2021)
MAIN Pairing/Characters: Wen Kexing/Zhou Zishu, Ye Baiyi
MINOR Pairing/Characters: Gu Xiang/Cao Weining, Zhang Chengling, Jing Beiyuan, Wu Xi, Luo Fumeng
Rating/Category: NC17 SLASH
Word Count: 19180
Summary: Finally putting the ghosts of the past to rest had freed Wen Kexing in a manner he had never truly expected. For the first time he looked out across Ghost Valley and no longer saw a pitiful realm of criminals and monsters in human guises but real people who had no place else to go.

Content Notes: Written for IetjeSiobhan for [community profile] ficinabox 2025.

On AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/72633681
 

Christmas Services

Dec. 21st, 2025 09:51 am
prixmium: (Default)
[personal profile] prixmium
The kids at work had their closing ceremony/Christmas Mass on Saturday, and I had to go to it. It was fine, and I got to leave work at 1:00, which is the usual Saturday quitting time, but I'm not usually a Saturday worker.

Friday, I got my nails done.

This morning, I went to get some hair tinsel in my hair for the first time. I've wanted to do that since I first saw a girl at a middle school get them when I taught her.

Afterward, I went to church. I am glad I went and didn't flake, because the message from the woman pastor was really good, and I'm getting over my internalized weirdness about hearing a female minister.

It's kind of amazing how unfamiliar I find most Christmas traditions that aren't very secular and commercial. My early childhood was in my dad's most iconoclastic days; he'd gone from having grown up with very standard southern Baptist (not necessarily Southern Baptist) ideas and then got more into reformation theology/church history. He still is, but especially when I was little, he was really obsessed with the "regulative principle of worship" (the idea that unless the Bible specifically indicates that you should do it as part of worship that you shouldn't do it as part of worship) to the point that it kind of alienated a lot of people.

In a lot of ways, I am still kind of cynical along the same lines but maybe for different reasons? It's something I'm still working through.

In any case, my dad was Goin Through It about things that may have been originally syncretistic or whatever, so when I was very small, we didn't have Christmas trees and stuff. Later, it softened a little, but when I was like 3-6 or 7, it was a bit of a family drama at times that my parents were "depriving me of being normal" by insisting that I not hear lies about Santa Claus from them and not have a Christmas tree at home.

I was a little rule-follower and kind of superstitious (as many little kids are) in addition to what my parents are telling me, so when my grandmother had a light-up "angel" on top of her Christmas tree, I hid my eyes from it and everyone thought I was a freak because I thought it was a bad "idol". My parents didn't tell me to do this, but it was my toddler brain trying to follow through on what I had been taught to understand.

Anyway, as a result of the particular religious flavor I grew up with, Christmas is a weird time for me. Doubly so because I am working at a Catholic school and just kind of feeling my way through what it is I believe. I still very much identify as a Christian, but I guess I'm about the age my dad was when I was born and going through the process of untangling some of my long-held assumptions as well.

All of this to say that I feel a little dumb and culturally stunted by the fact that I do not know religious Christmas hymns and carols and whatever as well as other people do. Like I know SOME of the words but most of the hymns I grew up singing were like early protestant stuff, which I still like honestly, but as the closing hymn at Tokyo Union today, we sang:



We did so at a somewhat lower tempo and with the organ (or maybe just a deep-voiced piano, I don't know), so there was something about it that was even more moving and kind of Cool in a way I find hard to describe.

I just find that some of the music that I've been exposed to attending this church and, rarely, a PCUSA church back in Chattanooga, talks a lot more about justice and the social obligations of a Christian in the real world and not just spiritually bypassing and looking forward to heaven or the end of time or whatever.

I don't think there's anything wrong with looking forward to eternity in some way, but I am deeply bothered by the whole "well, the world is going to end soon anyway" excuses of the casual American Christian nationalist death cult thing that bleeds through so much of American Christianity. But sometimes I just feel kind of lost and confused by the fact that I deeply hold my religious values and beliefs but also feel like a stranger to broader Christianity? Plus the fact that I am progressive and LGBT affirming. However, I feel like I am slowly experiencing some growth and introspection, which is nice.

Outside of my spiritual thoughts, one of my recent frustrations has been that I struggle with introspection more than I used to. I feel like so much of my mind and time is spent entangled with my professional duties as a teacher that I sort of lost even my continuity-of-self at times in it. I think about how I used to have this very vivid inner world of daydreams, but I lost it for a long time (maybe since I've been back in Japan basically but sometimes before that, too).

In some ways, my current job is a lot better than any job I've had before in terms of giving me time during work hours to do all of my duties, but then sometimes the hours are extended anyway, and while I love and adore functional public infrastructure and transportation, relying on public transportation means that even though I am not actively mentally involved in vehicle obligation that I spend even more time in vehicles than I did back home when I was so frustrated by always being stuck in a car.

That said, I'm very grateful that I am occasionally feeling some kind of improvement in terms of my sense of self-continuity, and I would appreciate if any older adults have ideas for how to keep going with that. I miss myself and my daydreams and my Fanfic Idea Generation, lol.

I'm also very grateful for just how much utterly better my life is than it was this time one year ago.

2 days and I am flying to Canada to see best friend for a little over a week.
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