Lifeless Slabs
Aug. 15th, 2025 07:21 am![[syndicated profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/feed.png){kind=small}
metafilter_feedAI Country Music Erotica?
Aug. 15th, 2025 07:09 ammetafilter_feedMurderbot promptfic from Tumblr
Aug. 14th, 2025 10:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
sholio***
1. A prompt for Murderbot and Gurathin undercover in the Corporation Rim. Originally posted here.
( 1000 words or so )
2. A request for de-aged Gurathin. Originally posted here.
( About 1100 words )
Follow Friday 8-15-25
Aug. 15th, 2025 01:09 amysabetwordsmith posting in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
followfridayHere's the plan: every Friday, let's recommend some people and/or communities to follow on Dreamwidth. That's it. No complicated rules, no "pass this on to 7.328 friends or your cat will die".
Trump Planning to Offer Alaskan Mineral Resources to Russia
Aug. 15th, 2025 04:16 ammetafilter_feedAbsolutely wild. If this actually happens, how in the world will Republicans defend it?
Alphabet Moon
Aug. 15th, 2025 04:13 ammetafilter_feedexec is having an affair with a young employee, HR says we shouldn’t use references, and more
Aug. 15th, 2025 04:03 amaskamanager_feedIt’s four answers to four questions. Here we go…
1. Exec is having an affair with a young employee
I’m not sure what to do here. The young employee of one department and the exec of another department are having an affair, never mind the fact that the exec has a girlfriend at home of several years. These two met outside of work but things heated up quite literally in the office. He is much older than her and could be her father. They say it’s consensual.
I’m not sure what to do … just let it all play out and maybe it’ll go away? Are there any legal implications of this situation? I wouldn’t want either of them fired as they’re both pretty valuable at the company, even the new employee.
Is he in her chain of command or otherwise have any authority over her work? If so, this is very much not okay, and the company needs to be informed of it. Most companies have policies against employees dating people in their chain of command because it poses significant legal liability, potential for bias, and potential for the appearance of bias. It can mean that the younger employee’s accomplishments won’t be seen as legitimate by others, and it can open the company to charges of harassment down the road (“I wanted to end things but he implied he’d make things hard for me at work”).
If he’s not in her chain of command, does he have opportunities for influence over her work? If so, the company still needs to be informed, for the same reasons above.
If he’s not in her chain of command and doesn’t have any influence over her work … well, it’s gross, but not something you as a coworker need to get involved with unless it’s causing issues at work.
Related:
should an extramarital affair disqualify someone from a promotion?
my employee is having an affair with a married coworker
2. HR says we shouldn’t use references to decide between finalists
Recently colleagues on my team were having trouble deciding between two great candidates, and I suggested they could use the references to help them decide who to hire.
This was HR’s response: “It is not appropriate to use references as a deciding factor as there may be information conveyed about the candidate that is not directly linked to the job requirements, skills, knowledge, abilities and because we are speaking to different people for references which can mean the responses can vary and could influence the outcome based on their ability to give a ‘good’ reference.” They also mentioned job search confidentiality and that they would only check a reference right before extending an offer and that most references came back as “good” anyway, so it doesn’t matter.
This seems inaccurate with some elements of sure, that makes sense. Agree on keeping their job search quiet but not that we can’t use reference information in the decision-making. What do you think?
I’m a big fan of references when they’re used correctly and think they can be crucial in letting you avoid a bad hire. (Here’s one particularly notable example.) If your HR department finds that they always come back as “good,” they’re not doing them effectively. References aren’t about pass/fail; when done correctly, they can give you nuanced information to help you assess candidates. After all, someone could be great at one type of job and still not well suited for the role you’re hiring for.
That doesn’t mean there can’t be problems with references, too. There can be, so managers need to be trained in what they’re really looking for when talking to references, as well as how to look for patterns, not a single bad take, countering bias, and so forth. But your HR is out to lunch on writing them off entirely.
3. Did I ruin my reputation at my co-op?
I’m currently doing a two-year co-op at a well-known company in a role I’m extremely grateful to have. It’s a fantastic opportunity, and I care deeply about making a strong impression and growing professionally. That’s why I’m feeling especially anxious about a mistake I’ve made, and I’d love your insight on how managers typically view situations like this.
I’ve been here for about two months (out of a 24-month program), and somewhere between weeks 5 and 8 I missed two meetings and was late to three others. These weren’t just informal check-ins — they were with my immediate team or stakeholders I really want to build trust with. My manager brought it up during a check-in — not harshly, but as something to be aware of. I took it seriously and immediately adjusted my habits: double-checking invites, building in buffer time, and setting stricter reminders. Since then, I haven’t been late or missed anything.
Even so, I can’t help but worry that this affected how I’m perceived, especially compared to other interns who may not have made similar mistakes. I know I won’t be evaluated for a potential return offer until the very end of this co-op, likely in late 2026 or early 2027. But I’m scared that these early missteps might stick in people’s minds and work against me when that time eventually comes.
I’ve been doing my best to go above and beyond in every other area — being proactive, learning quickly, asking thoughtful questions, and contributing meaningful work to my team. But I still feel like those few meetings might outweigh everything else.
From your experience, how do managers typically view these kinds of early mistakes if there’s clear and consistent improvement afterward? Am I being too hard on myself, or is this something that might realistically affect my future evaluation?
It’s true that letting that happen multiple times wasn’t good, but it sounds like you took the feedback seriously, adjusted your habits and systems, and haven’t missed any meetings since, which is exactly what you want to do to demonstrate that you understood the problem and it’s under control. And you have a ton of time to demonstrate that since this all happened in the first two months of a 24-month program. In fact, you have 91% of the program remaining to create a different impression, which means that as long as you ensure it doesn’t continue happening, people aren’t likely to still be thinking about this by the time you’re done. You should be fine!
Some reading:
when your boss has to correct your behavior, does it impact their impression of you forever?
4. Can I ask to see Legal’s sign-off?
This is an oversimplification but the legal consequence would be the same: Many people may be familiar with seeing cookie banners when they visit websites. That is because in the EU there are legal requirements about how and when cookies can be used. I was asked if it is technically possible to store information we’d normally put in a cookie using a different storage technique. It is technically possible but in my understanding those techniques are also covered by the same law. I said we’d need Legal’s okay first, thinking they would not okay it. The person came back and said, “Legal okayed it!”
They are not my boss and haven’t asked me to do any work. But if my boss assigns me this ticket next week how do I cover my butt? A team message seems like not enough?
I once tried to teach Legal that a CDN and “the cloud” are the same thing and I got scolded, so I’m not super inclined to try to make sure everyone understands the technology in use here. But I’m not a lawyer either, so I’m not sure about my interpretation of the law either. I’m not actually *in* the EU so I think the personal risk here would be around them looking for someone to throw under the bus if someone files a complaint. How do I protect myself in this situation?
Can you reply back to the original person now and say, “I’m actually really surprised they okayed it, because as far as I understand, this is something we could get in trouble for. Would you mind letting me take a look at exactly what they okayed so I can make sure there’s no miscommunication about what we’d be doing? I don’t want to us to start working on it and then have it cause problems down the road.”
Alternately, you could explain the whole situation to your boss right now and ask for their advice about how to proceed. Or you could wait and see if it’s assigned to you, and then do that then. Any of these is reasonable.
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Terraria: Fanfiction: Starry Night
Aug. 14th, 2025 11:20 pminfinitum_noctem posting in fan_flashworksFandom: Terraria
Rating: G
Length: 52 words
Summary: Tonight is a peaceful night.
( Read more... )
SGA: Always Crashing in the Same Car by WonkyElk
Aug. 15th, 2025 02:01 pmmific posting in fancakeCharacters/Pairings: John Sheppard/Rodney McKay, Patrick Sheppard, Ronon Dex, Teyla Emmagan
Rating: M
Length: 11,758
Content Notes: no AO3 warnings apply
Creator Links: WonkyElk on AO3, cookiemom6067 on AO3, cookiemom6067 on the Audiofic Archive
Themes: Marriage of Convenience, First time, Hurt/comfort, Complete AU
Summary: “Damn it, John, you’re thirty-six, and you’ve never had a stable relationship.”
Patrick Sheppard adjusted his tie and gave him that familiar look, that 'I’m trying to love you, son, but you just keep on disappointing me’ expression, which had started somewhere around John’s eleventh or twelfth birthday - just as soon as he got an ounce of healthy rebellion - and had rarely left his dad’s face since.
Reccer's Notes: Ronon plays matchmaker in this marriage of convenience, recommending Rodney to John, who's undertaking the marriage mostly to piss off his father, but also to strengthen his place in the company hierarchy. Rodney seems the perfect spouse to annoy Patrick Sheppard, being brash, and, most importantly, male. But then it turns out they get on remarkably well, and eventually Rodney encourages John to be himself, not continue to try to please his (impossible to please) father. There's angst, character development, romance, and some action/adventure, until they work it out. An excellent read!
Fanwork Links: Always Crashing in the Same Car and there's a podfic by cookiemom6067 here
Show me a gambler and I'll show you a loser...
Aug. 15th, 2025 02:06 ammetafilter_feedAs of right now thanks to recent legalization efforts - sports betting is legal (in some form) in 39 US States, Puerto Rico and Washington D.C.. There are plenty of concerns about rising addictive gambling behavior in states with legalized betting Oh and Venezuela? They blanked Puerto Rico in their first game 5-0. N.B. - As of right now, the regulated bookmakers do not take bets on Little League games, but there are other venues that do.
After-hours library access program winning users over for flexibility
Aug. 15th, 2025 01:26 ammetafilter_feedSmallville: Red Tape by Lenore
Aug. 14th, 2025 08:19 pmgarryowen posting in fancakePairings/Characters: Clark/Lex
Rating: Explicit
Length: 16,262
Creator Links:
Theme: Marriage of convenience
Summary: Clark’s illegal, and Lex makes him a green card proposal.
Reccer's Notes: Here with another Smallville rec! This time, it's Clark who, ostensibly, needs to get married because he has no social security number, no legit adoption papers. Lex is the mayor of Metropolis in this story, and Clark is a reporter at the Daily Planet. Lex knows the secret of Clark's/Superman's identity, and he doesn't want to be the bad guy who has to deport a beloved superhero. Solution: marriage!
What I love about this story is how absolutely befuddled Clark is by Lex's proposal and the actuality of the marriage. It's SO CLARK. Lenore touches on another of my favorite Clark traits, which is his loneliness and his inability to sustain a relationship because of his secret. I don't recall the story explicitly stating Clark's age, but I think he's in his late twenties, maybe almost thirty. Those added years give more emotional weight to the (of course) eventual romance and falling in love.
Lois and the Kents feature in the narrative, and it never fails to delight me when Lois makes coffee or Mr. Kent talks farming with Lex.
Fanwork Links: Red Tape. This story was originally posted on LJ/Smallville Slash Archive and later moved to AO3, which resulted in a duplication. I was told by the author that this is the correct version.
Sex reversal in Australian birds
Aug. 14th, 2025 11:59 pmmetafilter_feed
Not all heros wear capes
Aug. 14th, 2025 08:44 pmmetafilter_feed"The detective wrote that the man charged in the crime ... had confessed after he was apprehended. "I did it. I threw the sandwich," the detective quoted him as saying.
Ms. Bondi wrote on X, adding that Mr. Dunn was "an example of the Deep State we have been up against for seven months"
Is this the return of resistance sandwiches?
"The Titanic was equipped by my company."
Aug. 14th, 2025 07:29 pmmetafilter_feedFound via Ender via kyraneko; Ender notes:
during Gugliemo Marconi's testinmony on the first day, you can literally see the inquiry realizing in real time that hey, why the FUCK isn't it mandatory for ships to have someone at the radio at all times in case of emergency?.... the inquiry is also occasionally really funny like when Lightoller has to awkwardly correct Senator Smith's abysmally bad math or when Bride talks about finding a man stealing the lifejacket his oblivious colleague was wearing (too focused on distress signals) so he had to get into a fistfight with some rando as the titanic was fucking sinking or when senator smith tries to get Cottam (carpathia radio guy) tell him when the fuck he started working on monday while Cottam tries to explain that he started work sunday evening and didnt stop until he passed out at his desk tuesday also i love that Bride's official estimate of how long he spent trapped under Collapsible B is "A lifetime" and "I got out eventually"(The Titanic previously.)
Musical stamps
Aug. 14th, 2025 06:47 pmmetafilter_feedHis exact pathology remains unknown
Aug. 14th, 2025 06:28 pmmetafilter_feedwhy does job-searching feel like actual torture?
Aug. 14th, 2025 05:59 pmaskamanager_feedA reader writes:
I have been trying to understand something about myself for years. You may not be able to help, but I figure it’s worth a shot.
My last job was an admin assistant role working with the same VP for 10 years. I eventually felt burned out and found a similar job where I’ve been for two years. This job has been a solid 5 out of 10, and I anticipate that dropping significantly in the coming months because of a looming project and issues with management.
The obvious solution is to find a new job, but I just … can’t make myself do it? This also happened several years ago when I decided to start searching. It seemed to take more energy than I could ever hope to have just to look for and apply to jobs. It ended up taking at least a year (maybe even two — it’s hard to remember) to find my current job. I finally managed to apply for two jobs and got the second one.
I’m a high performer with only glowing references, a solid work history, and an agreeable personality. I am also a recovering perfectionist and have my fair share of anxiety, and I’ve been going to therapy for 3.5 years, which has been extremely helpful for functioning in life overall.
I have used your advice on resumes, cover letters, and interviews. It feels like I freeze up during interviews despite my best efforts to prepare (maybe I should try a swig of vodka beforehand — ha!).
I guess my questions are: Why does it feel impossible to look for jobs? Why does reading every job description for which I’m qualified instantly make me lose the will to go on (job-searching, not in life)? Am I the only one who feels this way? Is this a lingering mental-health issue?
In case those questions are un-answerable, my other question is: What are some things I could try to make job-searching feel more like cleaning my house, which I don’t enjoy but manage to do regularly, and less like trying to lift a house with a crowbar?
You are not the only one who feels this way. But it’s also indicative of some kind of problematic thinking.
Part of me hates saying that, because it’s actually quite reasonable to dread the job-search process, which is dehumanizing in countless ways.
But because it’s also something that would be in your best interests to do — since you’re unhappy at work and think you’re about to be even more unhappy, and you seem well-positioned to find a new job, as these things go — the fact that you literally can’t bring yourself to do it does indicate something is going on.
My guess is that it’s some combination of:
* feeling like you won’t get hired, so it’s a waste of time
* feeling like even if you do eventually get hired, it will take a huge amount of work to make that happen (since last time it took at least a year)
* worrying that even if you do find another job, you won’t like it
* feeling like the stakes are unbearably high
* dreading the process itself — you mentioned you freeze up in interviews so I’m guessing it’s the opposite of enjoyable to you
* generalized anxiety latching onto this whole thing because it’s such a good target for the reasons above
A lot of those beliefs don’t stand up to scrutiny.
Yes, it took you a year last time, but you only applied for two jobs during that time. How much faster might it have been if you applied to two a week? Or five a week?
And that means your application-to-offer success rate is 50%. That’s unusually high. That says you have better chances than most people, and most people still find jobs.
You also say you’re a high performer with only glowing references, a solid work history, and an agreeable personality. Those are … pretty much the ideal conditions to search from.
All of which means anxiety is probably playing a much bigger role here than you’re allowing for. Are you actively treating the anxiety? Have you talked to your therapist about anxiety meds? If you haven’t, that’s worth doing — and it’s possible that could be the thing that takes this from “feels like trying to lift a house with a crowbar” to “not fun, but still doable.”
The other thing that helps a lot of people: lower the stakes in your head dramatically. If you’re freezing up in interviews because the stakes seem so high, it can help to go in assuming you’re not going to get the job / the interview is just for practice / they’ve already decided to hire the CEO’s nephew / you’re skeptical about whether you even really want the job and they’d need to prove to you that you do.
But I think you’ve got to tackle the anxiety first, and this will get easier once you do.
The post why does job-searching feel like actual torture? appeared first on Ask a Manager.
Hominids, by Robert Sawyer
Aug. 14th, 2025 10:30 amrachelmanija
A Neanderthal from an alternate universe where Homo Sapiens went extinct and Neanderthals lived into the present day is sucked into our world due to an experiment gone wrong. The book follows his interactions with humans in one storyline, and the repercussions in Neanderthal World in another.
I picked up this book because I like Neanderthals and alternate dimensions that aren't about relatively recent history (ie, not about "What if Nazis won WWII?"). The parts of the book that are actually about Neanderthal World are really fun. It's a genuinely different society, where men and women live separately for the most part, surveillance by implanted computers prevents most crime, mammoths and other large mammals did not go extinct, there are back scratching posts in homes, they wear special eating gloves rather than using utensils or eating barehanded, etc. This was all great.
The problem with this book was everything not directly about Neanderthal society. Bizarrely, this included almost the entire plotline on Neanderthal World, which consisted of a murder investigation and trial of the missing Neanderthal's male partner (what we would call his husband or lover), which was mostly tedious and ensured that we see very little of Neanderthal society. The Neanderthal interactions on our world were fun, but the non-Neanderthal parts were painful. There is a very graphic, on-page stranger rape of the main female character, solely so she can realize that Neanderthal dude is not like human men. There's two sequels, which I will not read.
It got some pretty entertaining reviews:
"☆☆☆☆☆1 out of 5 stars.
No. JUST NO.
I am sorry, but the premise of inherently and innately peaceful cultures with more advanced technology than conflict-driven cultures is patently absurd. Read Alistair Reynolds' Century Rain for an examination of how technological advancement depends on strife: necessity is the mother of invention, and the greatest necessity of all is fighting for survival. I will not be lectured for my male homosapien hubris by a creature that would never have gotten past the late neolithic in technology."
Hominids won a Hugo! Here are the other nominees.
1st place: Hominids by Robert J. Sawyer (Canadian)
2nd place: Kiln People by David Brin (American)
3rd place: Bones of the Earth by Michael Swanwick (American)
4th place: The Scar by China Miéville (British)
5th place: The Years of Rice and Salt by Kim Stanley Robinson (American)
Amazingly, I have read or attempted to read all of them. My ratings:
1st place: Bones of the Earth by Michael Swanwick (American)
2nd place: The Scar by China Miéville (British).
3rd place: The Years of Rice and Salt by Kim Stanley Robinson (American)
4th place: Hominids by Robert J. Sawyer (Canadian)
5th place: Kiln People by David Brin (American)
If I'd voted, it would be very close between Bones of the Earth and The Scar, both of which I loved. I made a valiant attempt at The Years of Rice and Salt. Like all of KSR's books, I'm sure it's quite good but not for me. I know I read Kiln People but recall literally nothing about it, so I'll give Hominids a place above it for having some nice Neanderthal stuff.
The actual ballot is a complete embarrassment.
updates: my boss’s wife cheated on him in front of me, sob stories on LinkedIn, and more
Aug. 14th, 2025 04:29 pmaskamanager_feedHere are three updates from past letter-writers.
1. My boss’s wife cheated on him in front of me, and now he’s icing me out at work
I took the part of your advice that involved just being cool and it sort of worked, for a while. I am American but this all happened while I was working at an office in Ireland. They do have a different attitude to drinking there (that stereotype is true) and it’s much, much more common to mix work and booze. They also have a very different approach to clear conflict resolution — in my experience, it is very unusual and rare in Ireland to just address a conflict directly and they find it very American and deeply uncomfortable. If I were to bring that whole thing up to my boss directly, he would likely self-combust before my eyes … so I didn’t. Or rather, felt like I couldn’t. And eventually, it got better.
I started feeling that if someone chooses to drink that excessively with people they give performance reviews, then they need to expect that there might be some wobbles in the professional relationship. And it definitely changed my willingness to drink with people who manage me (or fund our work)! When I think about the whole situation as well, the boss’ wife was falling over drunk, and I see it more through the lens of her being taken advantage of rather than some sort of affair. I wish I had framed it to him that way when we spoke about it. It makes the whole thing uglier. The boss ended up leaving in a spectacular fashion — lawyers were involved — and I haven’t been in touch with him since.
2. Does posting sob stories on LinkedIn hurt your job search?
I wrote to you asking if posting sob stories on LinkedIn hurts your job prospects.
As suspected in the comments, the majority of these colleges are much younger than me (mid-late 20s/ some early 30s) and spent most of their childhood / adolescence years constantly online. While some of my former colleagues eventually found jobs, quite a few have admitted that they felt that posting those sob stories definitely hurt their prospects (especially when one found their posts posted somewhere else mocking them). However, some have dug their heels in the sand saying that “naming and shaming” companies who do not hire or ghost them is the new norm.
As for myself, while I was able to continue to work in my field, the effects of the industry layoffs are really starting to show its effects. I am currently doing the job of 2-3 people, and have been averaging 70 hours a week. I experienced burnout before in this field, and I do not want to compromise my mental and physical health, plus I want to spend more time with my family, which right now I sadly do not get to see often.
I am currently job hunting for positions outside of my field. Luckily, my position has given me a variety of skills that can be transferred to admin roles. I am positive that the skills I learned from reading your blog will help me in my future hunt.
3. My coworker won’t use women’s names
I did end up asking my coworker what was up, after a particularly baffling conversation where he was talking about a manager who had retired before I started working here while comparing her to our highest manager and never using either of their names.
He admitted he had a hard time remembering names on command and just kept things vague, hoping we’d understand through context because constantly pausing to make sure he had the right name would disrupt the flow of the conversation. That’s about what I thought was going on, since he would often use phrases that in our country’s dialect of English refer to a woman whose name you don’t know or can’t remember.
When I asked why he seemed better able to get the men’s names right, he said it’s because there’s so many fewer of them in the office and he supervises most of them, so he’s been able to memorize which guy is which by remembering what job they do, which is harder with the women because our jobs are less clearly defined and he doesn’t interact with our work area as much.
Some people in the comments (which I couldn’t reply to at the time because I didn’t see it, but did read after the fact) seemed to want to assign him some kind of Christian offshoot religion that explained it, but we’re not in the U.S. and those kinds of hyper-specific churches aren’t a thing here. People can be shitty to women at times but it’s the Catholic flavor of shitty.
Since I chatted with him about it, he’s started trying to use women’s names more often, at least when talking to me … which hasn’t really made things less confusing because he keeps calling people by the wrong names at first call. But I caught him mixing up two of the lads who don’t usually work in the same space as him, so at least it’s no longer so targeted?
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