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Posted by Ask a Manager

Let’s discuss chaos — or just mildly embarrassing / funny / off-key things — that happened when you were eating in a restaurant for work.

Some stories that have been shared here in the past:

I was in my mid-twenties traveling to a conference with my fifty-something boss. He could be odd and a bit awkward but never creepy or inappropriate. We were having dinner at the hotel restaurant when approached by a violin player obviously offering romantic musical accompaniment. I politely declined but my boss excitedly requested a specific piece. I then had to sit there awkwardly for several minutes while the violin player played his piece circling around us as if he was enhancing our romantic dinner. My boss smiled the whole time and afterward spoke about how lovely the music was as if he had no clue everyone was thinking I was his much younger mistress meeting up at with him at a hotel. We were both married to other people and after this we went back to discussing business.

•     •     •     •     •     

I had just been promoted and my new boss invited me to lunch to discuss the job and any suggestions I might have. Having been a faceless drone for most of my short career, I was beyond excited and desperate to make a good impression. Above all, I wanted to order something tidy and easy to eat so that I could spend the lunch hour being insightful, witty, and bristling with helpful contributions. I ordered French onion soup. While channeling the business version of Dorothy Parker/Oscar Wilde, I quickly swallowed a spoonful of soup and discovered to my horror that the glob of rubbery cheese now nestled in my stomach, was attached via a rope of the stuff to the glob still in the soup bowl. While gagging and choking, I bit and gnashed at the rope like a demented shark, hoping I could finally swallow it and be free. A memorable first impression.

•     •     •     •     •     

My third interview for my very first managerial job involved me flying into Chicago where I would be meeting with “the Big Boss” right at the airport.

Finding each other, he suggested we get a table at one of the restaurants, where we both ordered sodas. As he was speaking, keeping my eyes focused on his face, I bent down to take a sip of my soda. My straw went way up one of my nostrils! Neither of us said anything and I prayed he somehow had not noticed.

I got the job! Years later, it was time for me to move on. On my last day, that same boss called me in to say good bye. Grinning ear to ear, he asked me if I remembered what he called “the Straw Incident” when he had first interviewed me. (As if that were something I could forget!)

•     •     •     •     •     

At a business meeting at a private club, I ordered a glass of lemonade and received a glass of lemon juice. Nothing like a cool refreshing mouthful of acid!

•     •     •     •     •     

My brother’s mother-in-law was a vegetarian in a rural community who once accompanied her husband to his company’s annual dinner. The dinner organizers were very proud of themselves for coming up with something they assured her was much better than the plates of plain vegetables she’d been served in the past. Her husband got steak. She got a slice of watermelon cut into the shape of a steak.

•     •     •     •     •     

Please share your own stories of work restaurant meals gone wrong in the comment section.

The post let’s discuss chaos at work restaurant meals appeared first on Ask a Manager.

Community Recs Post!

Oct. 9th, 2025 10:35 am
glitteryv: (Default)
[personal profile] glitteryv posting in [community profile] recthething
Every Thursday, we have a community post, just like this one, where you can drop a rec or five in the comments.

This works great if you only have one rec and don't want to make a whole post for it, or if you don't have a DW account, or if you're shy. ;)

(But don't forget: you can deffo make posts of your own seven days a week. ;D!)

So what cool fanvids/fancrafts/fanart/fics/podfics/other kinds of fanworks have we discovered this week? Drop it in the comments below. Anon comment is enabled.

BTW, AI fanworks are not eligible for reccing at recthething. If you aware that a fanwork is AI-generated, please do not rec it here

planes

Oct. 9th, 2025 12:23 pm
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Posted by HearHere

patterns that arise in origami can be translated into a set of points that together form the amplituhedron [en.wiki]. Somehow, the way paper folds and the way particles collide [quanta] produce the same geometric shape (previously)2
full_metal_ox: A gold Chinese Metal Ox zodiac charm. (Default)
[personal profile] full_metal_ox posting in [community profile] fancake
Fandom: Jungfraukallen | The Virgin Spring (1960 film)
Pairings/Characters: F/M, Gen; Karin | The Maiden, Per Tore | The Father, Mareta | The Mother, Oldest Herdsman | Bearded Brother, Middle Herdsman | Beardless Brother, Young Boy | Narrator
Rating: Mature
Length: 2,029
Content Notes: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Rape/Non-Con, Author Showed Her Work, First Person POV, Somebody Lives/Not Everybody Dies
Creator Tags: Minoan, Retelling, Remix
Creator Links: (AO3) [archiveofourown.org profile] Rubynye; (Dreamwidth) [personal profile] minoanmiss; (Tumblr) [tumblr.com profile] rubynye

Theme: Uncommon Settings, Fix-it, Found Family, Folklore & Fairytales, Food & Cooking, Historical AUs, No Canon Required, Old Fandoms, Small Fandoms, Research

Summary: Before you wed me you must know.

Author’s Notes: _The Virgin Spring_ is a haunting tale. One night I dreamt this version, and was able to write it down.

Reccer's Notes: Rubynye transposes Ingmar Bergman’s adaptation of a medieval Swedish murder ballad into her beloved Bronze Age Crete; she gives this account of its creation in the comments:

I almost feel like I, my waking self, can't take credit -- I literally dreamt this, fortunately on a weekend so I could write it down, complete with the note about the refrain of "this they should not have done". I have loved the Minoans for a long time so it makes sense that my subconscious decided to retell the story there, as much sense as subconsciousnesses make anyway. The Minoans, with a different sense of morality and the universe, wouldn't ask "why did God let this happen" but would note how people in a society should and shouldn't behave (I think at least).

Dreamland delivered its gift to a formidably disciplined, well-read, and eloquent mind: the story begins with a classic fairytale riddle (whose answer will hinge upon a fluid definition of family) and is knit together by an insistent and anguished refrain; the author carefully avoids the film’s conflict of Christianity versus Norse religion in a setting where it would make no sense, furnishes researched hit-and-run cultural color (a traveler gifts her benefactors with the exotic delicacy of…stone-baked wheat flatbread!), and spares an innocent whose fate in movie canon was undeserved—allowing a family to be (though not restored) renewed.

Fanwork Links: How To Raise a Spring, by [profile] rubynye.
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Posted by Kattullus

László Krasznahorkai is the 2025 Nobel laureate in literature. He is a 71-year-old Hungarian novelist, perhaps best known for his novel Satantango, which was made into a film by the same name. If you want to get a feel for his writing, you can find stories on Words Without Borders, London Review of Books and the New Yorker [archive]. Hari Kunzru interviewed him for the Yale Review this year, and one of his translators, George Szirtes, interviewed him for the White Review in 2012. Colm Tóibín interviewed him for the LRB Podcast in 2012 as well. There are many essays about his work, so here are ones by Taylor Eggan, James Wood [archive] and finally one by Ange Mlinko from earlier this year [archive].

The 2025 Nobel Peace Prize

Oct. 9th, 2025 08:52 am
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Posted by Wordshore

The 2025 Nobel Peace Prize will be announced at a press conference at the Norwegian Nobel Institute on 10th October at 11:00 CEST. Who can nominate, and the process for this year. Who, selected by the Stortling, decides the winner. United Nations Nobel Laureates. This year, 244 individuals and 94 organisations have been nominated; current bookmaker favourites include the Emergency Response Rooms in Sudan (wikipedia), the UNRWA, and Yulia Navalnaya.
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Posted by chavenet

To describe the commitment to the future as those of us in the present "sacrificing" ourselves is to fundamentally misrepresent what is at stake. Doganova quotes a report by the international Organisation for Economic Co-operation and Development that blandly claims it is "impossible not to discount," but Discounting the Future shows that this kind of thinking totally misses the point. By reducing everything we value to the present, we have, as she puts it, decided that our "sacrifices" must be rewarded "regardless of what that future might actually hold." from The Price of Tomorrow [NYRB; ungated]
m_findlow: (Date)
[personal profile] m_findlow posting in [community profile] fan_flashworks
Title: Somewhere that’s green
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Ianto, Jack
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 2,097 words
Content notes: None
Author notes: Written for Challenge 493 - Garden
Summary: Jack has a proposition for Ianto that includes something he’s never had before.

Read more... )

no fandom : icons : gardens

Oct. 9th, 2025 01:13 am
highlander_ii: House sitting in front of a chalkboard with some writing on it ([House] 004)
[personal profile] highlander_ii posting in [community profile] fan_flashworks
Title: gardens
Fandom: none
Rating: G
Content notes: None apply
Summary: icons of pretty gardens


gardens )
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Posted by emelenjr

Francine, the feline-in-residence at the downtown branch of the Lowe's hardware store in Richmond, VA, is currently all over the place, after having gone missing for a while. Lowe's | NPR | Associated Press | Washington Post | Wikipedia
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Posted by Ask a Manager

It’s five answers to five questions. Here we go…

1. When your coworker is your Uber driver

This happened to a coworker, not me, but now I’m paranoid it will. She told me that over the weekend she and her roommate got in an Uber to get to a bar, and the driver was our other coworker. I have nothing against side hustles/second jobs (I work one myself, as a bartender at a theater), but of all the people we work with (we’re standard office workers at a large employer in our city) I would not have expected this specific person to take up Uber driving for extra cash.

So, WWYD? My coworker said she was pretty silent the entire time but did acknowledge/greet our coworker/driver. I wouldn’t know how to act, especially if I was coming home after a night out and not sober, or with a date, or just having a bad day.

This doesn’t need to be a big deal! You’d treat the coworker like you would if the driver were anyone else you knew — meaning, greet them warmly, ask how they’re doing, and, if you’re up to it, make pleasant conversation during the drive. It’s no different than your own second job, or than if you ran into them on, say, a subway. I know the power dynamics might feel a little weird — you are now paying them to provide you with a service — but treat it like you would any other unexpected public encounter with someone you know from work, and it doesn’t need to be awkward at all.

If you weren’t in a frame of mind where you could easily carry on a warm conversation (whether from a bad day or whatever else), you could say, “I hope you don’t mind, I’m exhausted and was planning to just rest my eyes during the drive.” That’s probably a good strategy if you aren’t sober as well, to avoid lowered inhibitions leading you to say anything you normally wouldn’t.

2. My colleague has hives because of the stress of our jobs

I work in an industry that doesn’t seem stressful from the outside (arts and heritage) but, due to under-staffing, lack of clear exhibition schedules/timelines, and poorly defined job scopes, is really stressful. I have considered leaving multiple times, but the industry is small and it would be hard to get a similar job elsewhere.

Recently I found out that one of my colleagues has had full body hives for over a year. She told me and another colleague over lunch when we were talking about stress at work, and she said that her doctor has advised her to take a sabbatical. In the meantime she is taking antihistamines daily. However, she does not feel like she can take a sabbatical because we have ongoing projects that will only be completed in another year.

I was shocked to hear that and urged her to take a sabbatical. I lead one of the teams she is on and know that we could distribute her work while she is recovering. However, she said she doesn’t feel like she could.

A couple of days after that, I discovered that an ex-colleague also had full body hives from the stress of working our job. She has since left and the hives have gone.

I feel very concerned for the colleague who is currently experiencing hives. Is this something I should report to our manager? Or would that be a betrayal of her confidence?

Nope, don’t share it with your manager; this is your colleague’s private medical information and how she manages it is up to her. You can certainly raise concerns about stress and unsustainable workloads, and you can encourage your coworker to take time off/brainstorm with her about how to make that happen, but your coworker’s hives (two coworker’s hives, in fact — !!) are not yours to share.

3. Changing clothes in a non-locking office

I recently got my very own office — yay! It has no windows and is completely private, though it doesn’t lock. Is it unprofessional to change clothes in the office, rather than in the bathroom or a downstairs locker room? The office doesn’t have a culture of barging in without knocking, and people mostly leave each other alone unless the door is open.

I wouldn’t change clothes in a non-locking office unless you put a sign on the door saying “please knock.” Even if the culture of your office is not to enter without knocking, it’s still possible that someone might one day — they shouldn’t! but they could — and it’s just far better for everyone (you and them) not to have to deal with stages of undress at work.

4. Will my random email address hurt me in my job search?

I am new to searching for professional jobs. I have a random email address that I used for applying to colleges and scholarships, like 753rlaf61@gmail.com. Also, the name associated with it (my name, but not including my last name) shows up in an inbox as all lowercase. Will this random email be a mark against me as I apply for professional jobs? My name is too common for me to get myname@gmail.com, but I could get an email like myname[random numbers]@gmail.com. Would this make any difference at all when I am applying for jobs? If it would make a difference, is there a format or a few formats for the email address that you would recommend?

It won’t make any difference. If you wanted to look absolutely as polished as possible, you’d get an address more like name[random numbers]@ and also capitalize your name in the “from” field correctly, but no one is going to reject you for not having that, or even think much about it (if at all).

5. Should I mention performance ratings in my resume?

I work at a FAANG company known for being pretty tough/competitive in its performance ratings. Would getting the maximum rating multiple times be something worth mentioning in either a resume, a cover letter, or an interview?

When I interview people, I often have to probe pretty hard to get to what constitutes exceeding expectations at their company versus just doing one’s job, or whether someone was actually driving innovation versus riding along with their team, or whether their cool project actually met a business need. A high performance rating seems like convenient shorthand for “I accomplished things and my employers considered them valuable and my role in them important,” but I can’t recall anyone I’ve interviewed bringing up high performance ratings (as opposed to, say, actual awards), and I’m coming up on having interviewed 100 candidates at this company, so I’m wondering if it’s gauche.

It’s not gauche. Resumes can include things like, “Achieved highest company rating on annual performance evaluation all six years.” If you can quantify that, even better: “Achieved highest company rating on annual performance evaluation — awarded only to top 5% of employees — in all six years.” Even if you can’t quantify it like that, though, it’s still worth including; your interviewer can probe about how rigorously the company operated if they want to.

You just have to make sure to word it in a way that doesn’t inadvertently signal the opposite of what you intend to accomplish. Like if you were there six years, you wouldn’t want to say, “Achieved highest company rating on annual performance evaluation in 2022.” You want it to sound really superlative.

The post my coworker was my Uber driver, changing clothes in a non-locking office, and more appeared first on Ask a Manager.

A birthday? In this economy?!

Oct. 9th, 2025 02:36 am
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Posted by subdee

I received this email from Erica Payne of Patriotic Millionaires today and enjoyed it so much, I thought I would share the entire text. I hope you all enjoy it as much as I did.

Dear [redacted], Today is my birthday. Some people do not like their birthdays. I am not one of those people. I love my birthday. People have to be nice to you and you can pretty much do/say whatever you want (within reason). Anyway, I'm 56 today, which is both old enough to know better and too damn old to care. And I've got a few things to say... about Democrats, Republicans, progressives, and Jonathan Chait. Not necessarily in that order. So happy birthday to me. Buckle up. Let's start with the confidently incorrect Jonathan Chait, a senior writer for The Atlantic whose piece this week—titled Democrats Still Have No Idea What Went Wrong—is particularly obtuse, even by his standards (this is, after all, the guy who said, "If he does win, a Trump presidency would probably wind up doing less harm to the country than a Marco Rubio or a Cruz presidency. It might even, possibly, do some good.") The subtitle of Chait's piece is "The party's progressives seem to think the problem is not with their platform but with the voters" and he goes on to cherry-pick little bits of various speakers' comments (including mine) from the Persuasion 2025 DC event on September 30th to weave together a story about how progressive support of various social positions and various types of humans doomed the Democratic Party to defeat. And he asserts, quite aggressively, that rather than admitting it, progressives are getting "defensive," denying poll results, and "dismissing" the "false consciousness" of "working-class voters facing economic stress." Chait pulled a quote from my presentation of the Patriotic Millionaires' MONEY Agenda to make his point. Here's what he said: "What's more, where voters do support regressive positions, Democrats should dismiss this as a kind of false consciousness. As various speakers argued, working-class voters facing economic stress tend to lash out at vulnerable targets. 'When people are psychologically insecure, they are incapable of being welcoming to people who are different than them,' the activist Erica Payne said. 'This is about money. Money, money, money, money, money, money, money.'" I'm annoyed that Chait intentionally/unintentionally misrepresented both my point and the perspective of the entire conference, and that he intentionally/unintentionally left out specifics about the conference that would likely affect, if not entirely change, any reader's perception of the entire topic. And I'm really sick of this kind of misdirection, so I'm taking my birthday to respond. But what I really want is to have a conversation with him, publicly, about this nonsense he and the rest of the confederacy of dunces is spouting. So if you know him, please forward him this email. And if you really want to know what I said, you can see a snippet of my remarks below: This is about money, which Jonathan Chait would know if he actually listened to my presentation First of all, history backs up what I said about psychological insecurity leading people to scapegoat others for their problems. It's not an accident that as inequality has increased around the world, so has support for right-wing politicians, who blame groups like immigrants or ethnic and racial minorities for working people's financial woes. Nevermind the fact that "the only minority destroying America is the billionaires." Second of all, as we discussed in last week's Closer Look, Democrats have absolutely, positively NOT moved too far left in terms of what people want for the economy. The complete opposite is true. People want a higher minimum wage. They want higher taxes on the wealthy and corporations. Their support for labor unions is at a 60-year high. They want something to be done about out-of-control CEO pay. Want a wildly popular agenda that cuts across party lines? Start there. On a side note, it's worth saying that it's not just the lack of money that adversely affects people's psyches, the abundance of money does as well. Professor Paul Piff from the University of California, Irvine is one of the world's foremost thinkers on the psychology of wealth and power. He has conducted dozens of studies over the years that have demonstrated that people with more wealth tend to be more selfish and less empathetic towards others. Professor Piff actually spoke at our 2021 conference, Power and Money in America, and discussed his famous rigged Monopoly game experiment. Check out a clip of his remarks below, starting at the 14:00 mark. As I said at the Persuasion event, this is all about money, money, money, money, money, money, money. Anything that is not about money is just a distraction to keep you from thinking about money. The problem in America today is NOT a room full of people who accept their fellow human beings in all of their beautiful complexity, and who believe, deep in their hearts, that none of us will be truly safe and free until everyone is safe and free—or, you know, all of the attendees at Persuasion 2025. The problem in America today is money. The problem in America today is that over many decades politicians of both parties have worked together to structure our economy in such a way that a small group of ever-richer people receive its benefits. The problem in America today is that 86% of people who live here are worried about the price of food, nearly 42% can't cover a $1,000 emergency expense and that $80 trillion that rightfully belonged to everyone ended up in the pockets of the top 1%. And yes they are pissed. They should be. And, yes, when you are pissed and worried and scared, it is really hard to be nice to anyone. And the reality is that in order to maintain this unsustainable, immoral, and frankly stupid economy, the richest people in the country fund both sides of the so-called culture wars to distract people from the fact that they are stealing their money, destroying their futures, and harming their families. And here's the thing, no one currently in charge has any intention of doing anything about it. Neither the Republicans who are currently in charge or the Democrats who were in charge before this, including in that "decade of nearly unchallenged [progressive] supremacy" to which Chait refers. Um. Excuse me, which decade was that exactly? And that's the actual problem we have to deal with. In 2016, Trump beat Hillary Clinton by bashing Wall Street, Democrats' connections to Wall Street, and running to the left on trade and entitlements. Hillary couldn't counter him in large part because her husband, the best Republican president since Ronald Reagan, passed NAFTA, Wall Street deregulation, and huge cuts to welfare programs. In 2017, with full control of the federal government, Republicans on a party-line vote rewrote the entire federal tax code. In 2018, for the first time in American history billionaires paid a lower effective tax rate than every single other group of people in the country. Then here come the Democrats. They regained control of the House in 2019 by running against huge tax cuts for the rich; then in 2021 when they had full control they... oh yeah, didn't raise taxes on the rich or raise the minimum wage—the only two economic levers powerful enough to actually change the economic futures of working people. Here's the hard truth. Neither the Republican Party nor the Democratic Party—as currently constructed—have any intention of dealing with the harsh economic reality that the vast majority of Americans currently suffer. They have no intention of restructuring the economy in any meaningful way. They have no intention of taxing their donors or raising the legal minimum wage for workers. Democrats lost in 2024 not because they are woke, but because they are complicit. And everyone knows it. Republicans won because inflation went nuts, Joe Biden went comatose and Kamala Harris spent at least one of her 107-day campaign sucking up to billionaires and another one publicly announcing that she thought they should pay lower tax rates than working people. They are not confused, they are culpable. They do not fight hard for the things that you want because they do not want those things. And with people like Jonathan Chait carrying water for the economic status quo, that is unlikely to change. The last point I'll make about Chait specifically is that, on some really basic level, he lies by omission. There are two things he left out when he quoted me that I think are relevant. The first is my organizational affiliation. Chait refers to me in his piece as "the activist Erica Payne." That's it. "The activist." He doesn't mention Patriotic Millionaires, the group I founded and have led for 16 years. No mention of the hundreds of successful business leaders, entrepreneurs, and corporate executives whose perspective I represent. No mention of the 16-year effort this group of "proud traitors to their class" has executed to reform the political economy, never taking a position on "social" issues. The only time we even talk about social issues is when we explain to people that we don't talk about them, think about them, or take positions on them. We don't even take positions on how tax revenues should be spent. We think that government spending decisions should be made by regular people through their elected representatives. Our job as an organization is just to make sure that, whatever those expenses/investments are, that millionaires, billionaires and corporations pay for more of them. And to argue that most good tax policy has exactly nothing to do with revenue-raising anyway. Maybe Chait did not mention the Patriotic Millionaires because he read our piece from last week and knows we're right on the money about what's really wrong with the Democratic Party. Or maybe he just didn't think to mention that the group has caught on around the world with chapters now in the UK and Canada. He must have forgotten that we've testified in front of the Senate Finance Committeetwice!—and given speeches at the United Nations, the Vatican, and the Annual Meetings of the International Monetary Fund and World Bank. And by the end of this year, our advocacy arm will have helped introduce two pieces of legislation capable of actually fixing what's wrong with this country: the Equal Tax Act, which ends the preferential treatment of capital over labor in the tax code, and the "First 45 Tax Free" idea—a cost of living tax cut for working people, paid for by millionaires. Senator Chris Van Hollen (D-MD) discussed the latter proposal during his opening session at the conference, something that no one reading Chait's article would know since he chose not to include this bold idea that could actually save the Democrats from themselves. He even failed to mention that Sen. Van Hollen was at the conference at all, which seems a little weird given all the recent press the Senator has gotten lately for challenging establishment Democrats for their failures. I could have chosen a lot of different ways to celebrate today, but instead I chose to sit in front of my computer screen for several hours to bitch about an article that tens of thousands of people read and probably forgot about. But hey, it's my birthday, and I'll rant if I want to. Tonight, when I blow out the candles on the fourth birthday cake of my birth month, I will be wishing for Democrats to get their shit together, and for working people—in all the wonderful shapes and sizes they come in—to work together to beat the billionaires and get an economy they deserve. Will that take a big tent? Yes. So if you're looking for one, come stop by ours. As for Jonathan? He's just another trick candle, pretending to light the way. Thank you for all you do, Erica Payne Founder and President, Patriotic Millionaires

Love's such an old-fashioned word

Oct. 8th, 2025 06:36 pm
gwyn: (bucky & steve alley purple)
[personal profile] gwyn
A while ago, [personal profile] minim_calibre asked me if I'd read any Kate Atkinson and I said I had, but it was very long ago--I read Behind the Scenes at the Museum and the first Jackson Brodie book after I fell in love with the Case Histories TV series with Jason Isaacs. She ended up buying me two books she'd read, Life After Life and A God in Ruins, and I finally had the chance to start on the first one, which is like four inches thick so felt pretty daunting. I'd been so busy with work (some truly awful, awful books [mygodihateYAsomuch] and one really good one that I wasn't sure I could do it, but I really wanted to keep my reading streak going. It's been so wonderful to reclaim the reading part of my life, I can't even tell you. It's also hugely inspirational to my own writing when I'm reading really good fiction--or heck even nonfiction.

If you've never read Life After Life, I can highly, highly recommend it. It'd be easy to say it's essentially a time loop story/multiple timeline tale, where little decisions or events have history-altering effects both personal and global, but that barely touches on the story. I just loved it and I'm looking forward to the related book about one of the characters, I hope it's as un-put-downable as Life After Life.

I discovered there was a BBC four-part limited series of it a couple years ago, on Prime in the US, and it was...okay. It should have been at least six episodes, though, because a book that sprawling requires a lot more time--there were significant cuts to the story that I think any fan of the book would be a bit twitchy about, and a major change to the ending. Still, a lot of good actors and it was nice to see some of the characters come to life.

It's just so nice to feel like I can read again after all these years. Like when I have my nose in a screen, it's because it's something that adds a little value in my life, rather than the horrible garbage of everyday life.

Yesterday, a friend and I went to a pumpkin patch and U-pick farm, because she's very into the gourds and cucurbits for art, and I wanted to have a nice outing. We lucked out and got the most spectacularly perfect, sunny day in the 70s, and I found a couple of beautiful pastel pumpkins (one kind of a mottled salmon and blue-green and the other a pale blue) as well as a starfish-shaped gourd to buy, even though I've never been into Halloween at all. I'm not sure if I'll put them out on the back porch or the front, the front's pretty crowded and small, but I think that's the "obvious" place for a Hallloweeny decoration. I also bought some apples from the farm's produce side, and the best sweet corn on the cob I have ever tasted in my life. It was so good we were texting each other about it. If I didn't live over an hour away, I would have driven right back there for more corn.

Everyone always says fall is their favorite season, but I think if you live somewhere where it is relatively dry in October, and the leaves change early, sure, it'd be fine, but in the PNW it's just suddenly cold, super wet, and miserably gray. The leaves are just soggy masses, so you don't get to wander outside in piles of dry leaves, wearing your woolen sweaters and scarves, feeling the sun on your face while you drink your punkin spice bullshit drinks. Nope, instead you have to wear your Gore-Tex jackets and waterproof shoes and hope your street won't flood when the heavy rains have nowhere to go because everything's clogged with slimy leaves. Bleh. Give me spring any day.

My numbers have been holding steady at a place where it looks like remission, though no one wants to say it is. I could have a bone marrow biopsy, and may still do that, to determine whether I really am there, but honestly, then I'm just going to be doing pretty much the same thing I'm doing now, because I'm essentially doing what Dr. Li does for maintenance on people who've gone through stem cell transplants or the new hotness, CAR-T cell therapy. I am sure there'll be some fiddling with drugs, but considering the nightmare of the insurance situations right now, I don't know what will happen.

I had a mammogram today and a DEXA scan (which just seems so nuts to me, as it's for osteoporosis and I feel like having bone marrow cancer means that osteoporosis is kind of a silly thing to worry about), and next week I go to the dermatologist, and hopefully I will get some of these things done before the nazi pricks can take everything away.

As always happens, at the mammogram, the technician, who was nice and did a pretty good job of not hurting me, mentioned knowing someone with multiple myeloma who's had it for 18 years now. I cannot tell you how often someone tells me about their family member/friend/co-worker who has it and who's lived with it for X years, and I just...I have to smile and say oh wow. I HATE IT.

It used to be a death sentence, but until just recently, there were new drugs being approved constantly so the survival rates and times have been increasing constantly, but it's by no means an easy survival for most, and there is no such thing as a "cure" where it disappears completely. It always comes back, and I've been confronted a lot lately with that because some people in our support group have died, both of whom had lived with it for a long time, going back into treatment each time it returned. It always does. Ugh, I wish people would shut the fuck up about it. I know they think they're being positive for me, but it's just not as simple as they think.

Otherwise, I just keep plugging along. Blues is definitely getting pretty frail and fragile, but his appetite is great, so I'm hoping he hangs on for a while longer. He has a concerning thing on his lower jaw that might be a cyst or might be cancer or anything in between, but it's in a tricky spot, so all we can do is watch it for now.

I know there are other things I wanted to talk about--including my rewatches of everything from the X-Files to the Good Place--but I'll save that for another post, this one's long and boring enough!

a few things make a post

Oct. 8th, 2025 09:50 pm
twistedchick: watercolor painting of coffee cup on wood table (Default)
[personal profile] twistedchick
1. After a little experimentation, I've found that it is possible to sing most popular Christmas carols (and possibly other songs) with the only lyrics being repeats of "Epstein". I suggest this for the use of protesters, as I imagine the lovely sounds of four part harmonies with a stunning effect on the bystanders.

2. Does anyone else have tinnitis? And if so, how do you manage to fall asleep when everything else is quiet? I have been listening to rain sounds on a recording, which helps, but it's hard to be relaxed and ready and just NOT tip over into sleep. Suggestions welcome!

3. Songs I have figured out (to some degree) on Native American flute: the guitar lead line to Layla (the piano interval is in C and very easy); the sax lead line to Gerry Rafferty's 'Baker Street'; the Beatles' 'Blackbird'; bits and pieces of many other Beatles tunes; the Beach Boys' 'California Girls', including the key change in the chorus that most people don't notice. If my only real inheritance from my mother's dad is his ability to play anything he could whistle, I'm very glad to have it; it has done well for me all my life even though I can read music (he couldn't).

4. I bailed at the last minute on a dental cleaning today, because I got no real sleep last night (see 2.) and I was not up to driving for half an hour or having someone's hands in my mouth for an hour. I also felt overheated and queasy, and told the receptionist that when I called, and she agreed I shouldn't come in. We rescheduled for Nov. 6, which was Mom's birthday, so I'm not likely to forget to come. It's late at night and I still do feel a bit off, so I'm calling the whole thing self care.

5. And I'm looking forward to seeing the nominations list for Yuletide. Every year there are more diverse possibilities, many of which I have no idea about since I'm not up on the latest Korean or Japanese or Chinese shows. But there are still enough oldbies like me around that I should be able to cobble together some requests and a list of possibilities to write about.

Groovy Baby

Oct. 8th, 2025 10:50 pm
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Posted by Mitheral

Hotel Zed's Love Nest is the BC's (Canada's?) first hotel room designed explicitly for sex. Hotel Zed's 70s theme features everything you need including 5 head shower with grab bars, pole, swing, playpen sofa, and tantric furniture. And if you need some help or inspiration the room also features a library.

Other services available include private coaching from a professional educator and partnerships with toy and apparel providers.

Wishlist! I made things! :D

Oct. 9th, 2025 11:22 am
china_shop: Zhao Yunlan stretched out on a stool. (Guardian - ZYL sprawled on a stool)
[personal profile] china_shop
I made four things for Wishlist (one a little late) - two Weilan and two ChuGuo, two very General Audiences, and two not so much. :D

  • Title: to those who wait (1567 words) [General Audiences]
    Fandom: 镇魂 | Guardian (TV 2018)
    Relationships: Shen Wei & Professor Zhou (Guardian), Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan
    Additional Tags: Pre-relationship (sort of), First Meeting (for one of them), alternate first meeting, Coincidences/Fate, alcohol consumption, Urban Setting
    Summary:

    Shen Wei had planned to pour his professor into a taxi, spend a few hours patrolling the city as the Black-Cloaked Envoy, and then get to work on his literature review or perhaps draft a proposal for establishing a school system in Dixing. He was already constructing arguments for the latter in his head. But Professor Zhou was distracted by something down the street and set off with surprising vigour for someone who, a moment ago, had barely been able to extract his credit card from his wallet.

    Shen Wei was obliged to follow in his wake.


  • Title: defying gravity (1507 words) [Mature]
    Fandom: 镇魂 | Guardian (TV 2018)
    Relationships: Shen Wei/Zhao Yunlan
    Additional Tags: Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Established Relationship, domestic setting, Inspired by Fanart, Blow Jobs, Clothed Sex
    Summary:

    “Like this?” Zhao Yunlan hops onto the stool and stretches to prop his feet on the nearest ottoman. His elbows automatically find the edge of the breakfast bar behind him. He knows it looks a bit ridiculous—Da Qing never spares an opportunity to mock him for lounging like this—but it's surprisingly relaxing.

    And Shen Wei clearly appreciates the view. His throat bobs as he swallows. “Like that. Are you—comfortable?”


  • Title: Supportive (1807 words) [General Audiences]
    Fandom: 镇魂 | Guardian (TV 2018)
    Relationships: Guo Ying/Yu Jinlan (Guardian), Chu Shuzhi/Guo Changcheng
    Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Handwavy fix-it, POV Outsider, Gossip, slight social awkwardness, tiny misunderstanding, Getting Together, (ChuGuo getting together I mean), Established relationship for Guo Ying/Yu Jinlan obviously
    Summary:

    Guo Ying tells Yu Jinlan about his first day at the SID.


  • Title: a tempting fate (3238 words) [Teen and Up]
    Fandom: 镇魂 | Guardian (TV 2018)
    Relationships: Chu Shuzhi/Guo Changcheng
    Additional Tags: Episode Related, episode 18, Fight Club Case, Time Travel, Time Loop, Angst, Mild Hurt/Comfort, minor first aid, First Kiss (for one of them)
    Summary:

    Chu Shuzhi bends sideways so he’s right in Xiao-Guo’s face. “Xiao-Guo, look at me! Did something happen out there? Have you been hypnotised?”

    Hypnosis wouldn’t explain the change of clothes. And Xiao-Guo is actually laughing at him now. He pats Chu Shuzhi’s knee, too, and leaves his hand there as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.



My other late gift is still an extremely long, extremely messy draft, so I'll see how that goes...

ION, check this out!

Olson

Oct. 8th, 2025 09:22 pm
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Posted by Wordshore

Olson (same) is a 91 second track on Music Has the Right to Children by Boards of Canada (1998). Some covers... Played through a 1959 DEC PDP-1 computer. Reid (piano) and Kurt (violin). On KORG Volca Bass. A piano solo. With Moog Matriarch, Mother 32, and DFAM. A full track MIDI. Some synth then piano. ixi deconstructs, then plays.

What I'm Doing Wednesday

Oct. 8th, 2025 03:53 pm
sage: image of the word "create" in orange on a white background. (create)
[personal profile] sage
books
Checkmate (The Lymond Chronicles #6) by Dorothy Dunnett. 1975. cw: war, murder, offscreen sexual assault, subsequent PTSD. The exciting conclusion to the series. No lie, this one was rollicking, despite an overuse of untranslated French.

still reading: The Thursday Murder Club by Richard Osman. Book one. So charming.

still reading: Shubeik Lubeik by Deena Mohamed. 2023. Graphic novel. Shubeik lubeik translates to "Your wish is my command" in Arabic. This version of Egypt is modern except it has wishes that come true, and are regulated (and black market). Great concept. I'm only 20% through, but it's a good book so far.


yarning
finished a yellow bunny and the above calico Cat Stitch scarf. The scarf sold this morning (without even me listing it first) & another person wants to get a custom one made! Yay! I worked on a grey and black kickbunny at yarn group Sunday and had a nice time. I'm nearly finished with it, though now I have a commission to recreate a cat's favorite turkey leg toy with wool and catnip. And scarf customer reminded me that xmas is coming and it's time to to work on stocking the shop! I ordered more catnip & hopefully won't run out of silvervine yet. All in all, a productive week!

healthcrap
The drooping eyelid is making me crazy -- double vision, blurry vision, the eyelid being in the way of seeing. more healthcrap )

#resist
October 18: No Kings Day 2!

I hope all of y'all are doing well and can see with your regular number of eyes. :g:

I can see my house from here

Oct. 8th, 2025 08:11 pm
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Posted by chavenet

I have a side project to find the longest line of sight on the planet using a novel Total Viewshed algorithm. At a resolution of 3 arc-seconds (~100m²), the planet contains around 4.5 billion elevation samples. Now obviously we don't need to calculate the visibility between literally every single one of those, so how do we begin to cut it up? from Packing The World For Longest Lines Of Sight
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